It has been 6 weeks since my last blog but rest assured Pappa Latte Bhatti

is alive and kicking. As an natural optimist I am guilty of not always portraying a balanced view on things. This time around I am going to give a more balanced view, or rather focus on the more challenging (frustrating/irritating/annoying and tiring) aspects of paternity leave.

I do love our children but they certainly keep you on your toes and press buttons to make you explode (often I do unfairly). I have also noticed that my tolerance levels have significantly reduced since Zara arrived and as calm and cool as I try to stay, managing 2 children can at times be frustrating and irritating. Only this afternoon after a  2 hour shopping trip, I am in the Oracle car park with a screaming and very tired Zara and Reuben decides he needs to go for a wee. NOW! He then decides to roar into tears (end of the world tears) because he has missed the opportunity to use the car park ticket machine with mummy all because he was too busy watering the car park walls. The sound was heavenly.

I find myself raising my voice (not shouting) 😊 on many more occasions than before.  I don’t always have the time to negotiate or explain to Reuben why it’s not a good idea to put a sofa cushion over Zara’s face to stop her crying or pulling her along the kitchen floor because he wants to be a tow truck and then banishing her to jail by locking her in the under stair shoe cupboard for being a “Cheeky monkey” (mocking the way mummy and daddy say it);

Mmmm maybe this is not going to be as hard as I initially thought – lol. 😜. It was only a few days after writing my last blog  that things got interesting. Here is a couple of examples;

• Separation anxiety kicks in out of the blue. Aged 9 and a bit months Zara decides that she doesn’t like going to other people. This kind of screwed up a couple of my gym sessions. Having left Zara in the creche, after just 20 minutes, one of the carers pulls me out to let me know that Zara has been balling her eyes out since I dropped her off. This also made it very difficult to get things done like making breakfast or emptying the dishwasher or going for a poo as Zara would not let me walk more than a meter away without whining and crying or latching on to me like a leech. Oh how I dream of taking a poo in peace.
• The summer cold or was it teething or the weather?!? – Zara then decided in the same week that she wanted to catch a cold or maybe it was teething – who knows! Whatever the case this only tripled the volume and intensity of her whining and crying. Oh and although the cold has gone now, the whining and crying seem to have become a permanent fixture in the Bhatti house. The sounds are quite majestic when combined with a tired whinging 3 year old Reuben. Shame I can’t upload a video to this blog as I have some great video footage of the 2 of them at their best ( just worked out that I can embed a video so check this out- The Shopping trip) http://youtu.be/YAvFALUAuHw
• Still sleeping through – heck NO! – whether Zara had planned this attack or it is coincidence she then started to remind us of what it is like to be parents of a newborn baby by waking up at random times in the night. This was not helped by Reuben waking from her screams and then screaming “Dadda, Dadda…” wanting me to sleep in his bed and demanding random things. Last week he asked me for hard water (we have just had a water softener installed) and some bread at 4am. As much as Reuben loves his sister at 3am all he cares about is having it his way and telling me Zara will be “Just fine” if she cries.
• The gag reflex – It only gets better. As well as not wanting to sleep through anymore, Zara decided that she wanted a gruesome sounding gag reflex (fans of The Walking Dead may recognise some of these sounds), this scuppered my plans for sleep training. When trying to put Zara to bed and leaving her to settle we would get a few minutes of her screaming the house down and then on returning to her cot finding her poor little face covered in her salmon risotto dinner. We just had our carpets cleaned so have managed to find a way to ensure she yacks at the right angle not to get it on the carpet.

The Crystal Maze

I am sure other parents will know what I am talking about when I say this. I feel like I could smash the Crystal Maze challenges. Here is a feel of one my daily challenges;

Aztec Zone

Objective: to peel a boiled egg and prepare breakfast with a whining/screaming 10 month old baby wanting her breakfast and Reuben whinging because I have turned off Paw Patrol. All this whilst holding in a wee that you have been dying to go for the last 10 minutes and with only 15 minutes left to get in the car and on the way to school.

I don’t think I have ever felt such anger and frustration towards an egg before because the shell won’t peel off smoothly.

It is possible, but I can certainly say that mornings are a little more busier than before. I have even grown to love luke warm tea as this is better than no tea at all.

I think the real key to surviving has been Spa days! Whether it be our 9 year wedding anniversary or a date day with Seetal, I will find any excuse to visit spa breaks.com lol. On a more serious note I keep reminding myself that the more challenging times will eventually fade away (well at least improve) with time and some of these are only temporary but will be replaced by other challenges.

As much as I have moaned and whined in this blog I wouldn’t have it any other way. Reuben started preschool last week and I surprised myself at how it impacted me. After reading the “Good luck on your first day at school” card that my wife had written from us to him and although he has been attending nursery for the last 3 years I still found myself in tears and very emotional.

I still say its the best job in the world and it has only reinforced just what an awesome job predominantly women do. I would say to any fathers or men reading this, that they should not underestimate just how much work is involved and that the reward is far more satisfying than any amount of money.